Outstanding Xanthous

According to Chinese culture, our Zodiac consists of a 12-year cycle, each year named after an animal with distinct characteristics. Many Chinese people believe that the year of a person’s birth is the primary factor in determining their personality, physical and mental attributes and degrees of success and happiness throughout an entire lifetime. The 12 signs are: Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Sheep, Monkey, Rooster, Dog and the Boar. *

Today is the day that 2009 begins for the Chinese: the year of the Ox. Very much like the holiday season to Westerners, Spring Festival is a time of sharing, caring, and sweeping in the new and propelling out the old, with a week full of visiting relatives, cooking, dining, laughing, giving and receiving red envelopes of hope, and non-stop fireworks day and night. This entry is in honor of my mother, born in 1927, also an Ox year. By now, she is obviously not a spring chicken, but her half-moon shaped eyes still shine the same when she smiles.

At four years old, my became very ill and had to be hospitalized. When the doctor came to check on her, he found that she was unable to communicate in Mandarin. It wasn’t because she was too young or too shy; rather, it was because she did not know the language at all! It wasn’t long before the doctors and nurses figured out that my mother could only speak French and Cantonese. What an unusual combination! Patients from all over the hospital ventured to my mother’s door, sneaking a peak, trying to see if she looked any different from other “real” Chinese girls. They couldn’t get over the fact that she was just an ordinary “doll from the Orient.”

I grew up just like my mother. When I was four, I could already speak a plethora of English words and phrases, taught to me by my parents and their parents, all citizens of the world. Everywhere I went, I greeted people with “Good Morning, Good Afternoon, Good Evening.” I spouted out “Yes, please” and “No, thank you” every chance I got. But the very first word I ever said was “banana.” Years later, when I journeyed to the States, I discovered that banana was also used in reference to Chinese people, which I thought was funny.

When my daughter was four, she moved to America with me; by then, I was already 40. I remember when I dropped her off on her first day of daycare, in downtown D.C., her new teacher came out to greet her.

“What do you have in your hand?” the teacher asked my little girl, who stood there, less than three feet tall, in pigtails and pink shorts, a ruffled white shirt, orange lunch box in hand.

“Banana!” Jenny replied in English, with a big smile. She then marched happily into the classroom by herself.

“She is adorable!” I heard the teacher’s voice behind me.

*

Before our citizenship was granted, every time we filled out a form in the States, we always had to check “Asian” in the nationality box. I used to work for one of the top law firms in D.C., and people constantly asked me whether I felt discriminated against, there. I always said no. People always ask Jenny if has ever experienced discrimination, at her private boarding school in Wellesley, MA, at Vanderbilt University in Nashville, or as a Managing Editor of the expat magazines that’s Beijing, that’s China and The World of Chinese. Her answer was also always no.

Not long ago, Jenny asked my mother if she ever fell victim to racism when she and my father were visiting professors at Oklahoma University, where they spent five years teaching medical students.

“My best friend Marge’s husband was the son of a mayor,” my mother replied. “Their family was never racist to me, nor was anyone else.” Jenny left the conversation feeling happy about how lucky we three generations have been.
 

Perhaps luck has shielded the three of us from racism, but as this New Year strolls in, I can’t help but think that perhaps it is our deep pride in who and what we are that has warranted that luck. In life, the only thing that matters is the collection of outstanding role you take on, in the face of the world. Our first outstanding role took the form of a xanthous coat, which we wore with dignity, conviction and self-respect.


May 2009 bring luck to all Chinese.
May 2009 bring success to all Americans.
May 2009 bring peace to the World.

 

*if you'd like to have some fun and find out yours or a loved one’s Zodiac sign, send me the year of birth via “Comment,” and I will get back to you with a proper summary of what’s in store for you!